Out walking by the river with Math Teacher. He saw a preying mantis on the ground. It looked like a piece of brown dry leaf. Math Teacher wanted to move it aside because bikers on the trail might not see it, and it seemed like it had already been injured.
As we were talking, the mantis started walking towards Math Teacher's left shoe. He moved, and the mantis followed. Gradually the mantis arrived at his shoe, and then climbed up his shoe, and then tried to climb into his pant leg!
"Hey, you hussy! You can't get into my husband's pants!" I shouted.
Math Teacher was afraid to shake it off so he walked slowly to the shrubs. The mantis couldn't get inside his pants; so it tried to climb up outside his pants.
"Get off! Did you not see the wife is standing right here?" I demanded.
Finally Math Teacher stepped onto the shrubs, shook a little, and then the mantis moved off his pant leg and onto the grass.
We waved goodbye to the mantis and continued our stroll. Math Teacher said, "I bet you never thought I'd get hit on by a mantis."
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At Doutour while having coffee, a Japanese grandma sat down at the table next to us, then she started chatting with us. So happened we lived in the same city. She owns a drinking bar *hint* extroverted personality.
Then her focus switched to Math Teacher. She said Math Teacher was cute. She asked if he were my husband. She said she wanted to kiss him and take him home. Lastly she reached over to touch his beard.
SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!
Math Teacher was very uncomfortable and wanted to leave. Fortunately the Japanese grandma started talking to other people and soon after left.
I have a bitchy resting face so I never get hit on, not from a preying mantis or from a cougar!